Whoring My Blog Out...For the Children.

Note: if you're not exactly 'the reading type,' I'd suggest scrolling on down to "RECAP" where the most important info lies. The rest is just life.

Happy Friday to all!

So check it, check it. BOY am I glad I got up the gumption to put on pants yesterday--TWICE, might I add.

Baby steps.

I'm glad because Adrienne and I pulled out a rock star performance yesterday at the weekly Mustache-a-thon meeting.

Summary of what the hell I'm talking about:

- I tutor at a place for inner city kids.
- To raise money, they are having a mustache-growing contest.
- We meet at a bar each week to check in.
- For the upper-lip impaired, a creative, mustache-related project is presented each week.
- Adrienne and I cheated slightly and have become "partners in mustache."
- Last week, we took pictures of cupcakes with mustaches traveling through the world.
- The point of us doing these projects is to inspire people to donate to this tutoring center. Yes, it does make a lot more sense to donate to someone's mustache-growing than two girls playing with cupcakes. But IT'S FOR THE CHILDREN.

SO! Yesterday was our second check-in with a whole new project. This time, they challenged us to make something mustache-related to sell in their store.

OH CRAP! BACK UP!

Forget what I said.
Let's start with this backstory:

When the first tutoring center opened in San Fran, they set it up in a storefront. Everything was going well until they found out that in order to be in a store, you had to actually sell things. So they did! They set up the tutoring center in the back, and created a Pirate Supply Store in the front. I imagine there were eye patches, fake parrots, lessons in "Yarr," etc.

Since then, they've set up tutoring chapters all over the US, with different-themed storefronts in each city. Chicago's theme is Spy Supplies. So it's actually called The Boring Store, but when you walk inside, you discover all kinds of spy supplies, like bananas to hide your cell phone in, sunglasses that help you see behind you, that kind of thing. Check it out. Cutest website ever.

Okay, now BACK TO WHERE I LEFT OFF.

Our challenge this week in the mustache-a-thon was to create something mustache-related that they could sell in The Boring Store. Adrienne and I came up with a Mustache Flowchart, to learn what kind of Mustache is right for you.

Voila.


Sadly, we did not win "1st place" and therefore the "prize" for the night, which was a copy of McSweeny's. But we did win the prize that is Winning At Life. The MC of the night, who is also in charge of The Boring Store, came up to us and asked if he could take the poster, because the store actually wanted to sell more posters, and he thought ours was a good idea. So that's all we know right now, but it means that in theory, I could have something I wrote (and Adrienne could have something she designed) for sale in an actual store! With a cash register! And price tags! And a website! Not too shabby!

So now I'm all hyped up on mustache endorsement. Which brings me to my next request: Sponsor us.

INCENTIVE: I've decided that it's not enough to just get a warm, fuzzy feeling from donating to tiny children who look like this:



You people need something more. And here is that reason:
If you donate $5 to the cause, I will write a blog post about you. And you alone.

Q: How will you know I donated?
A: These donations aren't exactly private. As long as you leave your name, I'll know!

Q: Emily, you do not know me.
A: Don't I?

Q: No, you don't.
A: Oh. Well, it's called Google, my friends. Or I will write a poem about you. Or you can tell me something about yourself in the comments here, and I will base a lengthy, made-up story about you and post that.

Q: What if you already wrote a post about me?
A: Well aren't you just the luckiest thing in the world. Tell ya what. I'll write another one. And it'll be better than the first! Eh? How's that for unachievable expectations?

Q: What if we haven't seen each other since high school?
A: In that case, PLEASE donate and I will give the world another magical post about my youth, your youth, and the weird, awkward things that happened during that time.

MORE INCENTIVE!
Adrienne, as a graphic designer extraordinaire, will also make you your very own logo if you donate $10. Think of it! $10 from you, and you have your own personal logo to sign off your emails! IT'S LIKE MAGIC! INTERNET MAGIC.

RECAP
Go here. Scroll down until you see Collabostache (which is now a picture of two cupcakes in front of the Epcot center...of course) and put in however much you want to donate.
Donate $5 to this place: Receive your very own dedicated blog post right here.
Donate $10 to this place: Receive your very own blog post AND your very own logo.

What have you got to lose?! ...I mean, besides ten bucks.