Tuesday, December 27, 2011

The Ankle Saga: A Story In Pictures

So. Okay. OH MY GOD, I have started this blog post 80 times and deleted it and started it over, because I have no idea what to talk about right now.

Do I talk about how I rolled my ankle on the way back to Chicago? Yes, let's go there, shall we? In fact, let's go there with visual aids. Because everyone likes visual aids.

On my way to the airport, I walk out the door, down two blocks...

...and then as I'm lifting my suitcase over a curb I also step in a small pothole. There was a crunching noise. It was not awesome.

After about 5 straight minutes of whispered profanity, the girl at the bus stop asked me if I was okay. I told her yes.

When the bus came, I hobbled to the back where I thought I could stretch out. I put my foot up on my suitcase for...blood flow...or whatever reason it is that you elevate a twisted ankle. But then the bus actually filled up, and I kept getting dirty looks from people who assumed I was spreading out on public transportation. I wanted to shout, "NO! I usually mock those people! I am just like you! I AM NOT AN ANIMAL! I AM A HUMAN BEING!" But I couldn't say any of that because I was concentrating so hard on keeping myself from making wounded moaning noises. I refused to be the person at the back of the bus and MOANING.

Eventually I got to the airport...

And then THIS happened.

I had to sit down on the ground like a 3 year old to take off my shoes at security.

Of COURSE I was at the furthest gate. OF COURSE I was.

In Economy with limited space and an ankle hurting like holy hell, every time I crossed my legs I kept hitting the girl next to me. She was not amused. But for some reason, "Sorry, I twisted my ankle" didn't seem like a valid excuse for why I couldn't stick to my own assigned spot.

In the end, I made it and hobbled into the arms of my parents who came to pick me up.

Luckily my family has twisted their ankles so often that we were stocked with fancy Ace bandages and ice packs. Apparently my clumsiness is genetic. And at least I had an excuse to sit on the couch and demand other people feed me cookies and milk. Nothing like being surrounded by the people you love in a warm house with plenty of food (and no joke, 5 kinds of butter) to nurse you back to health.

And hey! On a separate note--check out that survey over on the upper right. Let me know what you think. Totally anonymous even to me, so you can answer even if you think you're a stalker for being here. (By the way, you are not. OR ARE YOU?...No, you aren't.) So give it to me straight. Twitter: Y/N/Meh?


Jo said...

OH MAN. Traveling while in pain is just TERRIBLE!

Taylor said...

Pretty sure my ankle started aching about half-way through the story.

Hope it's feeling better. The drawings BELONG IN A MUSEUM.

Jennifer-Eighty MPH Mom said...

You poor thing! I love your drawings...they are too funny!

there really is no place like home...and people to take care of you :)

I hope your ankle is feeling better...