The Gym Saga: Happy Endings All Around

On Saturday, Joe and I went to our "new" Bally's at 5pm, hoping to get in one more crappy work out before we finally left that crappy, crappy place forever. And guess what? It was closed.

And this was, I'm pretty sure, my exact word-for-word reaction:


So Joe and I marched on over to XSport Fitness, slapped a few dollars on the counter and demanded a shot of whiskey and a tour.

They have a climbing wall. And TVs on all their cardio. And SUNLIGHT. Because, guess what? Their gym isn't actually just a moldy dungeon cellar with a sign that says "Bally's." We were sold.

On our test run of the place, I finally got to watch tbs again (yay!) Except apparently it's now the Tyler Perry channel (boo.) So I watched The Kids Are All Right starring Tyler Perry as a man named "Terry." Yeah. Feel it. Feel that in your soul.

But the point is, I got to watch SOMETHING that wasn't The Bally's channel, with a static screen suggesting that blueberries are healthy (ARE THEY NOW?!)

While we were walking home, Joe said "The only downfall is that there are still old men in the locker room walking around naked." I told him, "Yeah, but that's not the gym's fault. That's humanity's fault." Because, really. If you can go one locker room trip without seeing some old person's bits, you have performed a miracle.

So we've got a new gym now! And it's great! And I'm excited to work out again (I mean, as much as you can be excited to work out, really.) So hopefully this means that the saga has ended. We shall see.