I think Amy Poehler might be secretly watching me from the bushes and then recreating my life on Parks and Rec. It's becoming freakish.
EXHIBIT A.
I make this exact face to Joe at least seven times a day
EXHIBIT B.
Awkward when attempting accents
EXHIBIT C.
I got 100% when I sang Playstation karaoke for "Baby Got Back."
Leslie Knope rapped the lyrics to "Parents Just Don't Understand" without pause before Ron finally told her someone was on fire and she had to leave.
EXHIBIT D.
Friday night I was high on exactly ONE red bull and explaining to people how my new dance move was going to involve my feet firmly planted on the floor at my arms moving in awkward circular motions.
EXHIBIT E.
The more nervous I get, the faster and more nonsensical I become, before I am no longer speaking actual words. Also, the leader of our program at work is named Carl. I have called him Kyle, Craig, and Doug several times. Luckily not to his face. To his face, I stick with "you."
Leslie went on a practice date with her friend, Anne, and got so nervous she knocked over a vase and blanked on the word "bathroom," opting for the replacement, "wizz palace."
EXHIBIT F.
A few weeks ago, I accidentally drop-kicked my phone into a wall.
EXHIBIT G.
My senior year of college, my friends would ask me to tell them stories about my latest attempts at love for a good laugh. One story involved a guy putting on his favorite episode of Family Guy and then asking, "So, do you wanna make out?" (Hint: no.)
Really what I'm saying is: watch Parks and Recreation and you might as well just be watching a blonder, nicer me.
1 comment:
skywriting isn't always positive
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