I want to start a blog of substance. Something more than my livejournal of useless rambling. I want this blog to have a purpose. But how do I start off a blog with purpose? I mean, what if it really gets going? What if this blog becomes famous?! WHAT IF THEY MAKE A MOVIE ABOUT ME WITH MERYL STREEP?!
See, this is why it took me so long to start this thing off. So instead, I'm going to a) breathe and b) go baby steps on this one, and let my first post explain the probable title of this blog: "ejs is me."
In high school, I began graffiti-ing "i *heart* ejs" everywhere because I realized, well...I couldn't get caught! Everyone would speculate--who is ejs and why does someone love them so much that they need to write it all over the school? Then eventually someone would search the high school records (because it would be such a mystery) and they'd realize it was ME! And they'd wonder who was in love with me?! And I'd tell them I don't know, but I hope they reveal themselves soon! In the end, I'd be the LAST person they'd suspect. For who in their right mind would announce that they are in love with their own initials?!
Okay, it was a terrible idea. Mostly because I only really ever wrote it in pencil on the corner of my math desk, and because I admitted to anyone who asked, "ejs is me."
But ever since then, "iheartejs" has been my self-declared moniker. I like it. It flows. And no one else has picked it for a username for anything, as far as I know.
But it means more to me than just that. Because, since high school, I've been trying (and often struggling) to live up to my alias, to love who I am. And so here is one more attempt to learn to do so. A blog, where thoughts are public in a private kind of way, where I can share things I love or complain about something terrible, and where I can have everything laid out there in front of me, to show myself "these are the things that are ME. These are the reasons to heart ejs."
So I share, loud and proud: I heart ejs. And ejs is me.