What What WHAT Are You Doing.

Dear everyone,

I am currently in love with the Second City's "Sassy Gay Friend" youtube videos. They actually get funnier the more you watch them, to the point where I went from "haha" to "LOL" to "ROFL!!!!11!!!!1!!!1"

And I am not even joking. I really was rofl-ing. Like, on my back, kicking my legs in the air laughing. NO BUT SERIOUSLY. ASK JOE.

If you've seen Black Swan, kindly watch this one (It's my fave):

Maybe! No.

If you haven't watched Black Swan, any other one will do, but may I suggest this one:



In other news, I have just discovered how spoiled Joe has made me. I was over at Carla's (of "Wait, you're not Jewish?" fame) eating chocolate & peanut butter ice cream and watching Modern Family, as one does, and I requested to split a particularly large chunk of peanut butter. And Carla's husband, Bryan, wouldn't let me! The nerve! I may or may not have thrown a small temper tantrum. Aaaaaand I may or may not have called him a fat whore.

"No, Emily, I am not Joe. I will not split things with you just because you don't feel like eating the whole thing."

"But...but..."

It was the moment I realized: Joe basically does everything I ask him to do. Granted, I don't ask him to do much besides split peanut butter chunks and get me things when I can't get up because I'm busy snuggling with Regina Phalange. I came home later and asked him about it, and he said, "Well, yeah, I let you have stuff if it's something that will make you happier than it would me."

"Oh, so is that why you never let me eat the first bite of your pizza slices?"

"Exactly."

That's real love. It's giving but it's honest, and it will always, always choose the first bite of pizza over you.